How to Beat Toxic Bullies at the Office with EI
Bullying vs. Emotional Intelligence by Yamira Lee Johnson
Bullying is often referred to as a behavior observed among school aged children. However, what happens when a young bully is encouraged or does not receive the proper tools to improve their behavior and the resources to build healthy relationships?
Too often they grow up to become home and work place bullies.
Bullies can also be leaders. They lead the pack and make sure those with less power than them are submitted to their will. A leader with an imbalance of power in the office can be a harsh manager or superior that uses their position to oppress, humiliate, and fulfill their need to feel in charge.
They become micromanagers and use intimidation techniques to encourage productivity, which is an oxymoron. Trying to avoid confrontation with a work place bully can be a hard task to achieve but is not impossible. Fear enables bullies and they don’t like to be confronted, therefore an emotionally intelligent strategy is needed to overcome workplace bullying.
Guard your emotions. Take time to evaluate your situation and stand clear of spilling your emotions at work. The workplace should not be so personal, you are there to do a job and meet the needs of your employer and customers. Your career is not your identity, you are a lot more than that, so develop a thick skin and keep your emotions in check. Emotionally responding to your bully, not only it doesn’t help your situation, it fuels the bully.
Recognize the source. Understand that the source of the issue is not your responsibility. Bullies favorite armor is to shoot down confidence and often put you in situations to make you feel useless. Recognize your skills and areas of opportunities, shake off any attempts to discourage you. You own your joy and who you give it to.
Be the best you can be. Any mistakes you make in the office can and will be used against you. Be sure to stay on top of your game, meet schedule expectation, be open to learn and improve in everything you do, that’s a hard strategy to beat. Also, don’t get discouraged when the bully’s very own team of ‘yes people’ get more praise.
Get company in the right places. Become an encouraging leader by building positive relationships with your associates. Volunteer to mentor newcomers or train the team with industry proven techniques and help other excel at work. It will help you build respect and show the difference between a bully and a leader.
Take note. Nowadays, is too easy for bullies in power to get away with their rotten leading style, because they don’t get properly reported or are enabled. We asked human resource veterans, how to keep account of bullying episodes and this is what they shared; notate date, time, event, witness, how did you react and who did you notify. Keep it to facts, quote law and office best practices and rules. Stay away from emotional statements.
Climb the ladder. Make sure to review your companies Human Resource policies and follow hierarchy at the time of reporting a bullying incident. Accusing a superior of bullying is a serious matter, make sure you are really being bullied and is not your emotions being oversensitive and or taking offended because someone has a straightforward management approach.
Climb the ladder. Make sure to review your companies Human Resource policies and follow hierarchy at the time of reporting a bullying incident. Accusing a superior of bullying is a serious matter, make sure you are really being bullied and is not your emotions being oversensitive and or taking offence of someone because of a straightforward management approach.